Soooooo
My last and only post was written 9 months ago. I totally forgot I created this until I wanted to comment on a friend's blog today, and needed a username. Then the website told me I already had one! HA!
Her post was about black women expanding their dating horizons and since she's working in China, she's all about the Asians right now. I'd like to go on record as starting this "trend" amongst my circle, although that was definitely something I didn't mean to do. I just set my eyes on my guy one day in college and never really looked away since. While he was cute and obviously Asian, it was defintiely his spirit that called to me, as crazy as that sounds. But I have at least five black friends asking me about dating Asian men or starting to pursue them themselves. More power to them but I probably found the least Asian, Asian man on the planet lol. I am exaggerating, he does speak Mandarin, knows all the good places in Chinatown, knows Taiwanese and slang, eats some crazy food, his family owns a resturant...ok he's pretty Asian lol. BUT he's also got a very ubran, African-American influenced childhood, living with an adopted family for many of his younger years really turned him onto the struggles we face and makes it much easier to relate to him on different topics. Anyways, more on him later, I could go on and on :) (gag, i know).
Let's see, it's funny that the last time I blogged was right as I was about to get laid off, so since then:
1. I got laid off. It was definitely a blessing and a curse. I really thought my coworkers were going to help me out, since they all had so many connections but NO ONE really semmed to care after I was gone, except for one food stylist, who I never even got a chance to see after I left. The 1st few months were great, I got unemployment checks so I wasn't exactly broke. It was summer, so I ran a lot, went to the beach bymself, and slept late. I also had tons of free time to hang out with my bf, since he wasnt working either lol. But after a few months of that I got restless and antsy. I was sending out applications but in NY, my qualifications were a dime a dozen. I prayed and prayed for a breakthrough there but I just wansn't getting the results I thought I would. I slowly started to sink into a depression I didnt even realize. I stopped being social, I'd sleep 14-18 hours a day, I had constant headaches and even when I wasnt sleeping, I was dead tired. It wasnt until I went home for the holidays when my personal issues as well as some rifts with my family came crashing down on me. With the help of my bf, I have been building myself back up ever since, working on rediscovering my talents and confidence, because as much as I tried to deflect, it really did do damage to my healthy ego. I started working out and setting daily goals for myself which really got me back to having energy to, well, live.
2. I have been growing out my perm! Time to free these oppressed locks. My REAL hair is curly as well, but MUCH tighter and thicker. Hard to comb, hard to get straight. But using organic products and natural oils (shea, almond, tea tree, coconut etc) have really softened me up, and I am probably about 5 months away from being perm free. the only annoying thing is the contrast between my roots and these stick straight ends! When I wash it and let it air dry, it looks like grass growing out of a bush lol. but im excited to have a big curly fro. Here is the person who inspired me:
http://www.youtube.com/user/taren916
3. I had a string of blessings before the holidays. I was offered a temp job in the same business I had been in before, and I'm just so turned off to that industry in NYC that I turned it down for an internship with an Event Planner and Designer. I learned a lot there and did some huge celeb attended nyc events. I was insanely busy, with 18 hour days working for FREE like a nut to get experience lol. I was hoping it would lead to getting hired but everyone's businesses are suffering, and it was rare that new positions were offered. But at least I kept myself busy for a few months and lessened the gap on my resume.
4. In late feburary I decided to move back to RI. I was in desparate need of change (see..the wind calling) and since I dont have the cash for big changes I decided to move back home, hopefully clear my head, and get some motivation to get back out there. It was too easy to just sit in my apartment day after day, sleep and eat. Here I can join a gym, live rent free, and explore things in a smaller, quiter setting which I think someone needs when they're feeling, honestly like they might lose it. I have an interview tomorrow at a local art gallery, so we'll see how that goes. I moved back on Sunday and it was an emotional day. Losing my roomate, the landlords never showing with our security deposit, loading everything and making the 4 hr trip, and then my bf walking out the door was really the last thing that closed the door on my young single life in NYC. it was pretty heartbreaking. Now it's one day at a time, I am really going to try and focus on what will make me happy again, talk to God a LOT and have fun any way I can.
Until next time...Gone with the Wind.
